…and WE BREATHE, A Conversation For and About Caregivers and Self-Care with Loren Gelberg-Goff, LCSW, Author and Speaker
According to Loren Gelberg-Goff, LCSW, ask any caregiver how they’re doing, and they’ll tell you they are “fine.” But, if you take a moment, she suggests, and really ask them how they’re feeling, you’ll discover they may be stressed, full of guilt, anger or resentment---altogether not fine.
Somewhere early along the road to caring for a loved one, she points out, caregivers learn to put their own needs on hold. Whether a necessary or chosen caregiving commitment, caregivers take on an assumption that their loved one must ALWAYS be viewed as the priority, at all times and in all situations.
In our conversation Loren and I discuss how she opens their eyes to the reality that, to be able to sustain their ability to provide effective and loving care over any length of time, the exact opposite is true: caregivers must be sure that their own needs are met as well. “I work to reach caregivers where and when they need the most help.” she says. “I want to assure them that their wellbeing is just as profoundly important as that of the people they care for.” “I want to teach them new habits and perspectives that will empower them to treat themselves with love, kindness, generosity and compassion.”
In this episode we discuss:
- How caregivers can create 3 crucial boundaries that assure they take care of themselves first
- How caregivers can release the overwhelming impulse to do things for others simply out of guilt
- Why caregivers need to make clear requests of others without fear of being judged or rejected
- How and why caregivers need to get clear about what they WANT to happen, versus what they THINK they can achieve
- The #1 tool for caregivers to stop communications from becoming explosive confrontations in seconds
- The one crucial sentence that caregivers should use to receive support from others and change their life forever
- Why caregivers need to consistently make themselves a priority, clear in the knowledge that YES, they really do matter
- Why is it so important to just BREATHE
And so much more…
“You owe it to yourself and your loved ones to be the best-cared-for, happiest version of yourself possible,” says Loren. “You really can be relaxed, compassionate, resilient and loving - and embrace each day without stress or regret.” “As a caregiver,” continues Loren, “you just need the tools and practices for creating empowering new habits that lead to a life more like the one you’ve been wishing for.”